28 July 2011

Alarm Bells

I hate it when there are alarm bells going off in my brain about someone and I can't quite place why or what the problem is, or therefore, and perhaps most important, what the hell I should do about it.

I have somehow managed to become entrenched in such a situation and, if you hadn't guessed, am failing to manage to extricate myself. [Insert disgruntled emoticons here...]

These are the details, without going into... overmuch detail. (erm... ha.)

I have this "friend"... OK, "acquaintance" would be much more congruent with reality, but I think she considers me to be in her "friend" category as she probably considers everyone she's known for more than 5 minutes to be a "friend". (Yes. One of those.) I met her through work and got sucked into an outside work thing that she's doing and.... well.... I want out, because she's actually really fucking crazy.

Worse, in a way, she's supposed to be teaching me something -- something fairly important to me and something I've wanted to learn for a long, long time -- and over the past several weeks/months, I've come to the conclusion that she's completely incompetent as a teacher.

Teaching is hard. I know this. I've done it. And unless you put some serious thought and effort into constructing an effective lesson, you suck and you suck hard. She spouts the party line without thinking about it and that sort of laziness just pisses me off on principle.

So. Here I am, stuck, and unable to think of a graceful way out that doesn't involve hurting feelings and/or destroying an already (I suspect) fragile sense of self worth/confidence/esteem and starting to realize that I really, really, really need to and soon.

Thus, I am torn between wanting to help her get better at what she sucks at and having NO desire whatsoever to be her guinea pig, my natural tendency to want to be helpful and my other natural tendency to be brutally, horrifically honest, and my deeply ingrained sense of loyalty and my extreme intolerance of inefficiency.

Blarg. Sucks to be me this month. :/
.

8 comments:

blue_vampyre601 said...

i understand completely... i have to deal with lots of such people.. :D

Youngski said...

Perhaps you should feign disinterest in the subject or come up with some sort of reason why you cannot continue with the lessons. You may then back away gracefully...

Anonymous said...

Just be honest. Tell her you don't allow unbalanced, toxic people in your life and that you feel she fits both of those descriptions. I should add, however, that your reluctance to be honest and tell her the truth is a sign of your own issues so you might want to be careful.

Calling someone else crazy can come back and bite you in the ass.

minigreen said...

nice idea, thanks for sharing..

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