16 October 2005

The End

I did it! I finally, finally did it – I reached ‘The End’.

For three months now, I’ve been trying – and failing – to get there. No, I haven’t read the entire Oxford English Dictionary. No! I haven’t finally mastered the art of eating a five-pound cheeseburger in a single two-hour sitting. And, no, of course not! Why would I even want to finish the novel?? Sheesh!

I’m talking about short stories. It wasn’t that I didn’t have ideas. I had lots and lots of nice ideas, but none of them was willing to stick to the diet and stay around 5,000 words. See, every one I’ve started since I started ‘trying’ to write a Short Story has turned into a Damn Novel and had to be abandoned when I realized that ‘The End’ was nowhere in sight.

And then the vampire showed up. Followed by his girlfriend. And her psychopathic father.

OK, yeah, so none of them had any intention of keeping to the program either. As usual, they each in their turn started telling me their entire life history, which I was – naturally – compelled to cram into every available corner of the story.

But I beat them into submission. I tamed them . I trained them. I bloody begged them and finally, they listened to reason and gave up.

Here’s the secret weapon: I used my NaNoWriMo attitude on them. Uh, minus the word quota. And the deadline. In any case, it came down to this: if something wasn’t working, I said ‘Fuck it. I’ll fix it later.’ and moved on. A number of times, actually.

So, of course, the story’s a frikkin’ mess. It’s not so much a story as a sort of patchwork of half-written, loosely-related scenes that might possibly have a plot thread in common. If you look really close and understand Welsh. (The vampire, see, he’s from Wales. Don’t speak Welsh myself, so it’s been rough going.)

But it doesn’t matter. It’s written. From here on out, I’m not 'writing' anymore – I’m editing. Will that be better? No idea. Don’t care. Got to type the words ‘The End’. That'll do just great for now.

No comments: